Caribbean Sea

The woman walked to the edge of the boardwalk near the entrance from the cruise ships where tourists appeared to be hoarded in like cattle, in Georgetown, Grand Cayman, and leaned the entire top of her body against the railing. She bent her head and gazed under the surface of the turquoise water. She saw several fish, likely seargent majors, and also the blue flat fish rimmed with yet darker blue, that appeared almost translucent. Slowly, she pierced the skin on her hand with a slender, long, thick needle, and let drops of deep dark blood penetrate the surface of the aqua-marine water. The blood entered the sea, and seeped down an invisble funnel, discolouring the translucent blue fish, changing its colour to a vivid, deep purple.


It's a good thing I'm not a film-maker, or a full-time writer. It would be far too intense for me to live that way. The images are too distinct, the images too real, the imagination too splendid. Furthermore, given my very recent propensity to focus on imagining only good things for myself, the writing's content may not be sufficiently balanced.


Last night I attended the retirement farewell party of one of the executives in the bank were I work. His daughter who is also employed with the bank, made several jokes about the fastidious nature of her father regarding work ethic, expections on turn-around response to email, and dedication to the company, both on his part and on the part of the employees. It is this very intensity, and in my case my flaws and imperfections, that contributes to me 'fitting in' or feeling comfortable as a banker. It is simply within the parameters of the paradigms to which I am accustomed. Moreover, what may not be typical socially (such as, immediate responsiveness to email, behaviours requiring simultaneous logic, intuition, consideration of several perspectives, etc.), is actually rewarded in the context of moving forward organisationally.


For anyone wishing to become a successful full-time entrepreneur, if they are accustomed to being an employee, the change might require a significant paradigm shift. That said, continued expectation to propel oneself forward organisationally, within any industry, also requires a paradigm shift, a breaking of the 'terror barrier.' In other words, it is no longer appropriate to expect that the limitations of the past is an indication of one's future. My future is greatly exceeding any experience from the past, which, in addition to financial successes, includes improved health, communication, humour, thoughts, experiences, joy, and expansion of possibilities. These feelings, joys, are not tied to external events occuring. The joy felt within is attracting events, circumstances, and friendships towards me. It starts within and is subsequently demonstrated without. Starting from the outside in, in my case, is not a sustainable direction.